I have met and heard the tragic stories of many parents. PA is a function, by and large, of a custodial ex-partner, although some alienation can start while the couple is still together.

This blog is a story of experiences and observations of dysfunctional Family Law (FLAW), an arena pitting parent against parent, with children as the prize. Due to the gender bias in Family Law, that I have observed, this Blog has evolved from a focus solely on PA to one of the broader Family/Children's Rights area and the impact of Feminist mythology on Canadian Jurisprudence and the Divorce Industry.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Sarcastic Female Reporting on DNA testing from the Daily Telegraph in Australia

I get the impression Naomi Toy is a card carrying feminist not in touch with the totality of a man's feelings based on her fairly lop side reporting as follows:MJM

Dad's love not just DNA

Article from: The Daily Telegraph

By Naomi Toy

November 14, 2008 12:00am

IT'S a special family bonding moment being played out in thousands of Australian homes.

Dad scoops up junior and gently pops the child on his knee. But it's not time for a story or a tickle.

No, daddy just needs to swab the inside of your cheek for a few skin cells, darling, so sit still before you run off and play.

All dad has to do now is part with $500 and he can find out if the child he's loved as his own flesh and blood all these years is actually his own. Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, doesn't it?

The advocates of DIY DNA testing think it should, judging by the benign name they've given the procedure - peace of mind paternity tests.

But just who is getting peace of mind? The fathers? The mothers? Maybe.

The children? Not likely.

Up to 6000 home-testing kits were sold last year and, while there is no breakdown about who is using these tests, recent studies suggest they are used at a time when parental relationships break down, leading to disputes over child support.

The Daily Telegraph revealed this week that child support payment orders to 860 children have been torn up since mid-2003 based on DNA paternity evidence.

Those figures suggest hundreds of children are being dealt a devastating post-divorce blow by being told their father is not who they believed to be.

Men's rights groups hail these tests as a solution to all problems about honesty. But money is also a motive - witness the celebrity example of Eddie Murphy and former Spice Girl Melanie Brown.

Brown named funnyman Murphy as the father of her daughter Angel, but he refused to acknowledge her until he had a paternity test.

Perhaps he had reason and every right to question whether he was in fact the father but the question of who was going to pay child support seemed to be as big an issue as who was the biological father.

And so it appears to be with the cases that don't make the headlines around the world. These tests are aimed at people who are in a vulnerable position and are used as ammunition by warring parties with children caught in the crossfire.

A testimonial on the website of one company which sells this service comes from a father who paid child support to his ex-wife for five years.

He did a private DNA test of his two children and discovered they weren't his, so he challenged the payments in court.

"The court dismissed child support and freed me of responsibility," he reports.

Just like that. One minute he's the father, the next he's not. Exit stage left, bye bye kiddies, have a nice life. No doubt he's saved himself thousands of dollars, but his children have paid the price.

Although "misattributed paternity" affects just 1 per cent of the population, spokeswoman for lobby group Men's Rights Agency Sue Price supports mandatory paternity testing at birth.

At the very least, she argues that paternity should be confirmed by a DNA test before any order is made by the Child Support Agency.

"Child support must be thoroughly convinced through the use of DNA tests that they've got the right father," Ms Price said.

"If they do a DNA test and they find out the child is not there's they then have a choice as to whether they are going to continue in the relationship, what they are going to say to the mother, can they survive what is going on."

Anne Hollonds, CEO of Relationships Australia NSW, contends that is possibly the worst time for children, who are often old enough to understand what's going on between their parents.

"For the sake of not having to pay, what you are doing is compromising some extremely important family relationships forever," Ms Hollonds said.

"It's done from the mindset that biology is the prime thing and of course we see lots of situations where biology isn't the prime thing such as step parenting . . . and adoption.

"Biology isn't the primary thing but people will try and use that to opting out of situations. I do worry about people being drawn in by the promotion of these technologies to people who are vulnerable and worried about being ripped off rather than recognising to themselves there will be losses.

"They might save a few dollars but they might lose everything.

"It's making a choice to put money first. What you wouldn't want to have is parents split up and for them to completely lose their father."

It's hard to argue against the fact that men have the right to know if they are the father of a child.

But there must also be times when a child has the right not to know anything other than that they are loved.

My comments were left as follows:

You don't understand the issue at all. Men are used frequently by mothers in divorce proceedings as whipping boys. Men have been historically marginalized on separation and divorce and frequently cannot even see their children. The new law on equal parenting in your country may help to change that. It isn't the case in most other countries, just yet. Love of the children, if the dad has been able to keep a relationship, won't stop but the fraud perpetrated by lying, cheating fraudulent women will. The children need not even know of this. The playing field is being leveled. A man who has formed a bond with a child won't stop the relationship, if he can control it, but he can rightfully stop being duped. This is in the best long term interest of the children as fewer women will get away with lying about who the father is and entrap an unsuspecting man who has been victimized. Having consensual sex with someone shouldn't turn into a life of payment for a child not his. Are you a card carrying feminist or do you not yet "get it."

1 comment:

DNA Services of America said...

I do not know if your country is more advanced in this situation or not - but I can tell you as a DNA collector in the United States - whether it is biology or money - everyone has the right to know the truth. I am female and I agree with Michael Murphy - a DNA test is a level playing field for men and women and the children.