I have met and heard the tragic stories of many parents. PA is a function, by and large, of a custodial ex-partner, although some alienation can start while the couple is still together.

This blog is a story of experiences and observations of dysfunctional Family Law (FLAW), an arena pitting parent against parent, with children as the prize. Due to the gender bias in Family Law, that I have observed, this Blog has evolved from a focus solely on PA to one of the broader Family/Children's Rights area and the impact of Feminist mythology on Canadian Jurisprudence and the Divorce Industry.

Saturday, February 28, 2009

F & F Protest in Support of Truth-Telling Politician Crow Dickinson Causes Uproar in NH Town

In the Conway Daily Sun of February 27, 2009 a column appears by a feminist by the name of Susan Bruce who entitled it "The Slap Heard ‘Round the World". She is getting her 15 minutes of fame and is fully enamoured of it. From the obscurity of her location in NH she now gets hits from lots of different places for criticizing Crow Dickinson for doing nothing more than speaking the truth. See my article here http://parentalalienationcanada.blogspot.com/2009/02/mom-ordered-to-foot-dad-full-costs.html about a women recently "caught out" doing that very thing and was obliged to pay her former partner's $30,000.00 legal fees for trying to get a "leg up" by taking the child with her to a shelter and hiding. Now who would do such a thing do you think? If the local Starting Point Shelter Director, Suzette Indelicato, actually does screen for false representations she is one of the very few. Kudo's to her. Somehow I don't quite believe her entirely but heck maybe they are far more advanced than most who take the female at her word because that is the feminist mantra. "A woman wouldn't lie about DV." Yeah Right! Bruce also opines "The Conway selectmen probably didn’t intend to tacitly condone wife beating, but they did." Well no they didn't. They spoke the truth and biased feminists and others who don't have a clue that Domestic Violence is not a gender issue but a family issue given the statistics it is perpetrated in equal doses by either sex. Men suffer at least 1/3 of all injuries but there are no places for them to get help in this community unless this shelter actually provides service to battered men. As always gender bias is at play. DV shelters are important components of a community safety program but they need to be bias free providing services to families not one gender only. The police although indicating they refer both parties of a DV incident to a shelter don't seem to understand that very few men will admit to being a victim of DV. They need to address this shortfall in their thinking.MJM. The following is my email to the community on the statements of Mr. Dickinson: Mike Murphy [mailto:mike.murphy@ Sent: February 25, 2009 12:18 AM To: 'conway@conwaynh.org'; 'khallowell@conwaynh.org'; 'glennsacks@fathersandfamilies.org' Cc: 'jeremy swanson' Subject: Fathers and Families: In Defense of Crow Dickinson's Comments on False DV Allegations in Divorce

The use of false allegations in DV is a well established tactic by women to get a “leg up” in divorce/custody proceedings. Many bar associations also recognize the ease with which one can get a restraining order without benefit of any credible evidence.

DV shelters in many parts of North America teach this to women as part of their feminist indoctrination. To hear them get self righteous is the height of hypocrisy.

A recent court case in Ontario, Canada recognized the unilateral action of a women to take herself and a child to a DV shelter to get an advantage was inappropriate. On Jan. 30, 2009, Justice Denis Power, in Tulchinksy v Shuster, [2009] O.J.No.405.” holds that Elena Shuster's actions amounted to "abduction" as well as to "bad faith conduct" under Rule 24(8) of Ontario's Family Court Rules which provides cost sanctions for litigation misconduct. Justice Power condemned Shuster’s "pre-meditated”, "unjustified" and "ill-advised unilateral conduct" in secretly taking the six-year-old girl away from the matrimonial home and her father, against the child's best interest”. Ian Vallance of Ottawa's Kimmel Victor Ages, called the decision a warning to those who try to get the upper hand in custody disputes. "We've all dealt with situations where a parent, typically the mother, abuses the criminal justice system and runs to a shelter with the children-for a ‘leg up’ in the custody dispute:' said Vallance. "This case sends a strong message that this type of behaviour will not be tolerated and severe sanctions, namely a realistic award of costs, will be brought to bear 'on the offending party. The DV industry promotes this kind of behaviour and advises women to do this to get the advantage in custody cases.

Mr. Dickinson is speaking the truth. Do not kill the messenger.

Michael Murphy

February 27th, 2009 by Glenn Sacks, MA for Fathers & Families

"David Nevers, of Hinsdale, Ill., was once featured on an ABC domestic violence special after his wife got his kids — even though she put him in the hospital, he said.

“'Please, before you crucify Mr. Dickinson for his comments, listen to some of the stories divorced fathers have to tell,' he added."

In a story recently reported by the Associated Press in hundreds of news outlets, embattled politician Crow Dickinson of Conway, New Hampshire pointed to the problem of women using false domestic violence accusations to gain leverage in divorce. He is being crucified by misguided women's advocates. His comments came as he was asked to explain his vote against more funding for a local domestic violence service provider.

In response, Fathers & Families supporters deluged the Conway town council ("Board of Selectmen") with letters in support of Dickinson. Today the local newspaper group, which includes the Laconia Daily Sun, Conway Daily Sun, and others, wrote a series of articles about our protests and the controversy.

For those who live in New Hampshire/Massachusetts, Fathers & Families' Rachel Forrest will be leading a group of supporters to the Board meeting this Monday, March 2 at 7 PM in Conway, New Hampshire to support Dickinson. If you are interested in attending, click here.

For more background on the issue, click here.

In "Domestic violence against men a ‘hidden problem," (2/27/09), reporter Nate Giarnese writes:

Who’s sticking up for men? Droves are too ashamed to admit abuse at the hands of women they love. Many fear that reporting it means losing wives, kids and homes, or getting carted off to jail by a system geared toward women, men’s advocates say.

“It’s a hidden problem,” said Glenn Sacks of Fathers and Families. Sacks said he’s got nothing against women’s shelters and takes no position on Conway’s decision not to fund Starting Point. But after Conway selectman Crow Dickinson was vilified across the nation last week for saying women file false claims to gain leverage in divorce battles, group members are leaping to Dickinson’s side.

“It’s completely true,” Sacks said. “Several hundred of our members have written to selectmen in support of Crow Dickinson.”

David Nevers, of Hinsdale, Ill., was once featured on an ABC domestic violence special after his wife got his kids — even though she put him in the hospital, he said.

“Despite sending me to the ER four times (second- degree burns, broken nose, torn kneecap and a concussion), and despite being arrested for domestic battery (and pleading guilty), my ex-wife was awarded sole custody of our three daughters, and ownership of the marital residence,” he wrote.

“Please, before you crucify Mr. Dickinson for his comments, listen to some of the stories divorced fathers have to tell,” he added.

Even women rose to declare that men being falsely accused is a recurring problem.

“Sometimes when a man can prove that these charges are false, the woman gets no sanctions put against her,” wrote Barbara LaMarra. “It is a good time to check out the judges who believe this nonsense and put them off the bench. It is certainly time for change.”

Sacks said men resist calling police or shelters for help because they know they can be immediately arrested under laws aimed at safeguarding women. If they have any hopes of keeping their children, leaving home, even through a court-regulated divorce, is a scary risk, he said.

“They don’t want to provoke a divorce if a divorce means she’s going to get custody of the kids,” he said. “If they leave with the kids, there’s an Amber Alert, they get arrested. But they don’t want to leave their kids alone with a violent woman.”

Sacks agreed Dickinson’s comments were by no means a valid argument against funding Starting Point.

“We’re certainly not against domestic violence service programs,” he said.

But he said the cards are stacked against men, who [suffer 1/3 of all domestic violence injuries.]

“It’s a hidden problem,” he said, noting while men use brute force, women employ weapons and the element of surprise.

William M., of Wellesley, Mass., stood behind Dickinson.

"My wife has attempted to fake violence. The only thing that has saved me has been the luck of having a witness when it happened,” he said. “The facts support Dickinson, and so do I.”

Nevers said he finally won back his children. But it was a hard road, fraught with failed appeals and a trial court that decided her domestic violence was not a “relevant” factor.

“Five years after the divorce, my two younger daughters fled their mother’s house to live with me, rather than face her abuse,” he said. “It took another three years before I was named as their custodial parent.”

The full article can be seen beginning on page 1 here. Reporter Nate Giarnese did a good job--he can be reached at Nate@mountwashingtonvalley.com

[Note: We are not familiar with the details of the funding dispute involving Starting Point, and we take no position on the matter. However, we oppose Starting Point's supporters' vilification of Dickinson and their apparent refusal to discuss the very real issue of false allegations.]

4 comments:

susanb said...

Ye gods, you people are crazy. The only reason you think Crow Dickinson is a truth teller is because you don't know him.

All of this is regarding the funding of a shelter for victims of domestic abuse. The shelter serves VICTIMS, regardless of gender or sexuality.

This is small town NH - and you know nothing about it. If you knew more about Mr. Dickinson, you'd wouldn't be canonizing him.

By all means, stay in Canada and hate women all you want - but don't pretend to understand something you don't have a clue about.

Michael J. Murphy said...

We are well aware it is small town New Hampshire and along with that goes small town thinking. I've lived in small towns and know how familiarity can breed contempt.

The fact remains Mr. Dickinson spoke the truth and was condemned for it by small town thinkers aided and abetted by the gender feminist leftist thinking of many media people, yourself included. You have taken what this council has said and construed it to be something entirely different. You went way out in left field stating non-factual, non-associative hyperbole. Give us a break with the rhetoric. If this shelter does provide services to battered men, and there are many hidden in the invisibility of social morays then your community is far more advanced than others. I commend you for it. DV is a family issue not a single gender issue. It sounds to me like this shelter is more deserving of most in having some community funding. I assume the shelter director has produced a business plan identifying shortfalls and justified the requirement for further tax dollars.

The facts are women lie about abuse. They are being penalized finally in courts of law for doing it. Like most gender feminists who have no ready retorts you resort to the "hate women" or misogynist label that bears no fruit in debate about serious issues. Those of us who are veterans in the war against demonizing men and idolizing feminist mythology hear it every day.

Since when is having a different point of view hatred of anything. Do you hate men? Is that why you write the drivel that this council supports wife beating. Please use common sense and try to step back from the incestuousness of discourse that can occur in small towns, especially from long time politicians. I note every one likes to dredge up old positions of a person to further try and destroy their credibility. That is typical.

Finally no one is canonizing Mr. Dickinson. We are merely reacting to a truthful statement he made and the inane and untrue criticism he received for it. If you want to criticize then be certain you know of what you speak. Don't make statements that stretch the limits of credibility and do your self a disservice.

You have done so and like the laws of physics you have gotten a reaction. More will come at tomorrow's council meeting.

Best wishes.

susanb said...

Mikey - tomorrow is not a council meeting. It's the deliberative portion of the annual town meeting. An invasion by outsiders of one of the two most important annual meetings in town government is not going to reflect well on your organization.

None of you seem to have asked yourself why it is that there is no outpouring of local male support for Dickinson. You might give that some consideration. Or not. It's been a long winter, and the circus coming to town is always fun.

I won't be at the meeting tomorrow. This evil, left wing feminist will be driving her beloved, terminally ill husband out of state for radiation treatment.

Michael J. Murphy said...

Susan:

I'm very sorry to hear of your husband's condition. It is a very difficult time for your family.

You are a fighter Susan. Give your energy to your partner and I wish you the very best. I understand tragedy and grief and my heart goes out to you.