I have met and heard the tragic stories of many parents. PA is a function, by and large, of a custodial ex-partner, although some alienation can start while the couple is still together.

This blog is a story of experiences and observations of dysfunctional Family Law (FLAW), an arena pitting parent against parent, with children as the prize. Due to the gender bias in Family Law, that I have observed, this Blog has evolved from a focus solely on PA to one of the broader Family/Children's Rights area and the impact of Feminist mythology on Canadian Jurisprudence and the Divorce Industry.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Judge orders boy, 11, to live with father he hates and hasn't seen for four years

Its easy to see where the sympathies of this paper are given the headline. We never get enough information on the complexities of these cases but it does stand out to me this is a serious case of Parental Alienation. The mom has gone out of her way to deny the dad access and why would a son hate his father so much.   Even an abused child seeks love from the abuser. It appears the mom was playing the odds in that they mostly win in custody battles but it backfired probably because the dad had enough money to stay in the fight.

It will be of great interest to see how the boy thrives - or not.  I suspect as time passes the dad will ensure he has contact with the mom but if it were me I would ensure the 11 year old stays away long enough to remove the programming of hatred.  It is emotionally abusive of the mom to have treated her own flesh and blood to hate the father.MJM






By Jonathan Petre
Last updated at 5:27 PM on 24th January 2010
boy

A boy of 11 has been ordered to leave his mother and move more than 100 miles to live with the father he hates.

Appeal Court judges accepted last week that the boy was thriving with his mother, enjoying a life full of activities.

Yet they still ruled that he should live with his father, whom he has not seen for nearly four years.

Experts said the judgment reflected the emphasis the courts were now putting on the role of fathers and on the need for children to have contact with both parents. The boy’s parents split up before he was born and the father has been striving to win access for years.

He works in the City of London, lives in a £1million Stockbroker Belt house,  has remarried and has two more children, who are educated privately.

He said he would also send the boy to private school. The mother, a professional woman, had said she was happy for the boy to have contact with his father – when he was ready to do so.

But the Appeal Court upheld an earlier ruling at Coventry Crown Court, where Judge Clifford Bellamy said he was unconvinced that the mother really wanted contact to resume.

The appeal judges called the boy’s feelings of hate for his father ‘irrational’ and said he would suffer long-term emotional and behavioural problems if they were not reunited.

Judge Bellamy said ‘no stone had been left unturned’ to re-establish contact between father and son, but even indirect attempts through gifts and Christmas cards had failed utterly.

Despite the father being ‘devoted’ to his son, the boy was stubbornly resistant to ever seeing his father again.
The judge added that the mother’s arrangements for the boy to have extra-curricular activities every day of the week left no space for his father, adding: ‘All of this strongly suggests that, in truth, the mother has no real wish to see contact restart.’

Judge Bellamy said she had ‘significant influence and power’ over the boy.

He added that the animosity felt by the boy would quickly disappear once he was living under his father’s roof.

The boy’s guardian, an expert appointed to provide an independent view of his best interests, told the court: ‘I feel pretty ferocious in protecting him. Never have I come across such a strong sense of fighting for a child.’
But the judge said she had become too emotionally involved in the case and lost her sense of objectivity. 

At the appeal, Lord Justice Thorpe said it was the third time recently that the court had upheld properly reasoned decisions in favour of fathers.

Miranda Fisher, of London solicitors Charles Russell, said later that the activities of groups such as Fathers 4 Justice had tipped the balance – and courts were taking a tougher line on parents who denied contact between their children and their ex-partners.

She explained: ‘Twenty or 30 years ago it was not the normal expectation that fathers should be involved in looking after the children. Now more mothers have full-time careers and fathers are increasingly wanting to share in caring.’

1 comment:

Divorce to Happiness said...

I pray that judges in the states will also see the need to have both parents in kids lives. To many parents of divorce can not get past the anger and do what is best for the children. They are not being responsible to their kids. Children need both parents. If you have helpful hints as to how to get a 15 year old boy who refuses to have contact with his father reunited. It would be greatly helpful. Sincerely Mom and Step Mom