In the article from the CBC below Mr. Geesing has done the
right thing by taking this matter public. For many years courts have
given sole physical custody to moms (90% in Canada). Possession of
children is not 9/10's of the law it is 10/10's. When mom has the kids
she directly controls dad and often in a very twisted manner using the
children as pawns. The courts will not enforce access. Mom's know this,
as do lawyers, and use it as leverage.
The courts and
the lawyers are picking the pockets of vulnerable families including
the child's future financial integrity, and will not change without
public knowledge and intervention.
It is a gamble
because courts tend to use it against the parent who does go public.
They do not believe it is in the "child's best interest". It will be if
enough men go public, and we number in the tens of thousands, so men
get involved and support Billl C-422 for equal shared parenting.
Lawyers do not like this bill because it will reduce their business and
they intimidated Rob Nicholson, the conservative member for Niagara,
and Canada's Federal Justice Minister, at their annual general meeting
in Ireland in 2009 so much he said he didn't support it.
Think about this
for a minute. The Canadian Bar Association represent lawyers across
Canada. They are a lobby group. Nicholson is a member of this group. He
is also the Minister responsible for the creation and administration of
Canadian Law. Bill C-422 will reduce divorce and lawyer's income.
Isn't there something ethically wrong with this?
A few Human Rights Complaints against government policies and
bureaucrats down the road will help to steer the ship into more equal
waters as the system, whether it be DV or Family Law to name just two,
is way out of whack in favour of the feminist mythology that dads and
men are just plain bad.MJM
June 22, 2010
By CBC News
CBC News
A divorced B.C. father who hasn't seen his young daughter for several
months blames the family court system and is joining
others in a call for change.
"Before all this happened, my daughter had a great relationship
with me," said Dieter Geesing. "I feel really helpless. This
is not right."
Geesing said his ex-wife has been allowed to bar him from his
daughter because a court order requiring her to co-operate is
unenforceable.
"I love my child. It's not fair to her. You are cheating her of
her childhood," he said tearfully. "This child has a right
to interact with her father."
Geesing is a forestry specialist and his daughter is his only
child. He and his wife separated in 2008, when the girl was
eight years old. Since then, he said, his wife has tried to
shut him out of his daughter's life completely.
No contact for 15 months
"When I phone, I get the message 'She doesn't want to talk to
you,'" said Geesing. "On her 10th birthday, I left flowers on
her doorstep - that's it."
Geesing has had no contact with his child since March 2009.
A court order in June 2009 gave the parents joint guardianship,
with the child's "primary residence" at her mother's home.
The court also instructed the mother to pay for and attend
counselling to help establish a "healthier" relationship between
father and daughter. A letter from the counsellor to the judge
shows Geesing's ex-wife has since failed to co-operate.
"For me it's quite obvious here is somebody who doesn't want
this child to have any contact," said Geesing.
Records show there have been no consequences for the child's
mother. Geesing has been told he has no legal recourse but to
go back to court to ask the judge for help, which could take
several months.
No comment from mother
Because she is the custodial parent, CBC News is not
identifying the mother by name, to help protect the child's identity.
When contacted, Geesing's ex-wife refused comment. Her lawyer
did not respond to messages.
Geesing is one of several parents and family advocates calling
on Ottawa to change the Divorce Act to give non-abusive divorcing
parents automatic, equal roles in their children's lives.
"Why am I supposed to be the lesser parent?" asked Geesing.
"The default [in the courts] should be equal, shared parenting.
That should be the default."
When Geesing's divorce case got to trial, the child's mother
wrongly accused him of inappropriate behaviour toward his daughter.
"It completely went out of control," said Geesing. "Nothing
shook me as much as this accusation."
Ice cream photos called 'inappropriate'
Evidence of what Geesing's ex-wife deemed inappropriate
included pictures he took of his daughter showing off her first
permanent
teeth and pictures of her eating an ice cream cone.
B.C. Supreme Court Justice Burnyeat concluded, "Having reviewed
the photographs that the plaintiff believes were inappropriate,
I cannot reach that conclusion."
The mother also said it was wrong for Geesing to playfully
nibble on his daughter's ear while they were watching a DVD together.
The judge didn't buy that either, concluding, "I am satisfied
that the plaintiff overreacted to what might be viewed by many
as an innocent sign of affection between a father and his
daughter."
A detailed psychological analysis of the family found no
evidence the child had been abused, but concluded instead that the
mother had alienated her from her father. It also recommended
that if the mother didn't change her behaviour, the child should
live with her father.
"[The mother] has been using control as a coping mechanism of
...perverse anxiety," wrote the psychologist. "There has clearly
been a campaign of parental alienation."
"All of this court, this fighting, for nothing," said Geesing.
Access denial 'common'
"I know fathers who have been to court 50 times - in front of a
judge - only to be told that they will get access but they
do not," said Jerry Arthur-Wong, the executive director at
Vancouver's only men's resource centre.
"It's like the court appearance had no impact on the other
parent."
He said the extreme problems he sees are with the minority of
protracted, acrimonious divorces, where the parents go all the
way to trial to fight it out.
A 2009 study by Edward Kruk at the University of B.C.'s school
of social work took a detailed look at the parental roles of
82 Vancouver-area fathers, from all walks of life,
post-divorce.
Of the 82, 56 reported "lack of access" as their No. 1 problem.
Thirty of the 82 fathers reported being completely disengaged
from their children's lives.
Arthur-Wong also wants the Divorce Act amended to make equal,
shared parenting the norm, except in cases where one parent
is deemed unfit.
Conservative MP Maurice Vellacott is sponsoring a private
member's bill that would make shared parenting the starting position
in all cases that go to court. The bill passed first reading,
but won't be debated in Ottawa for several months, if at all.
Government undecided on bill
A spokesperson for Justice Minister Rob Nicholson said he
wasn't available for comment and the government has not decided
whether to support the initiative.
"Our government is committed to promoting positive outcomes for
the entire family during separation or divorce," wrote Nicholson's
press secretary, Pamela Stephens. "Since parents usually
understand their children better than anyone else, our government
strongly encourages parents co-operate to make parenting
arrangements in their children's best interests."
Arthur-Wong said the government has delayed taking definitive
action for far too long.
"Denial of access is pretty common," he said. "That is child
abuse and that is not acceptable in this society."
He thinks provinces should set up registries of parents who
ignore court-ordered access, similar to the maintenance enforcement
agencies that penalize parents who default on child-support
payments.
"Those who say that it would be impossible to keep a registry
of access denial, I say let's try it with the more extreme cases,"
he said.
Geesing doesn't expect to get another court date until the
fall.
"I don't even know what I will do the first time, if I ever see
her," said Geesing. "Should I shake her hand? Give her my
business card or something like this? What do I do? I feel
afraid to do anything."
Even if he doesn't see his daughter until she grows up, Geesing
said he hopes by seeing him tell his story publicly, she will
know one day that he tried to be a good father.
"I think I owe it to her to let her know that this is wrong."
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columbia/story/2010/06/21/bc-accessdenied.html#socialcomments